tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-64484529528528359732024-03-05T15:31:58.505+00:00The Texture of my MindImpressions left by meditation and lifeKusalanandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10043254830986060703noreply@blogger.comBlogger33125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-29721639931058259452012-07-26T21:35:00.002+01:002012-07-26T21:54:06.853+01:00Growing up (part 1)There are several metaphors for the project that is the spiritual life. The two most common variations are, I think, the path and the unfolding of the plant.There are limitations to both of these.<br />
<br />
The metaphor of the path likens the spiritual quest to a journey; one sets out on the path and sooner or later one arrives at the goal. This metaphor is good for clearly defining the goal, the path, and the various stages on the path leading up to the goal. The problem with it is that it's easy to overlook the fact that the traveller is constantly undergoing transformation, and that the person who initially set out on the path will not be the same as the person arriving at the goal.<br />
<br />
The metaphor of the unfolding plant, or growth, corrects for the missing transformation in the path metaphor, but suffers from not having a well defined goal and even less defined stages. One could argue back and forth between these, but ultimately they are complementary. In fact, both are "true".<br />
<br />
However, I'm not interested in writing about this right now. A few weeks ago, on a Thursday evening, a friend of mine was giving an informal talk on the topic of the <a href="http://www.freebuddhistaudio.com/community/tag/spiral-path/">Spiral Path</a>, a progressive path of positive states of being that spirals out of the twelve links of conditioned existence depicted in the outer ring of the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bhavacakra#Outer_rim:_the_twelve_links">Wheel of Life</a>.<br />
<br />
The Spiral Path starts of between the links of <i>Feeling</i> and <i>Craving</i>, a place in the twelve links sometimes referred to as "the gap". This is the only place in the cyclic round of conditioned existence where we have the opportunity to change our habitual response to our experience. With the manifestation of <i>Feeling</i> (which is the hedonic tone, the immediate positive/negative/neutral response not affected by cognition, that arises on <i>Contact</i>, the preceding link), we habitually respond with <i>Craving</i>. Craving in this sense covers both attraction and aversion, so we respond habitually by either moving away from or towards whatever caused the contact (or whatever we associate with the contact).<br />
<br />
Habits, though, may be changed, and with awareness we may be able to recognise the futility of the habitual reaction and to avoid going around the endless wheel of re-becoming. This is the start of the Spiral Path.<br />
<br />
This train of thought continues in another article which I'll write another time, and then I'll connect it with the title of this two-part article series.Kusalanandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10043254830986060703noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-37540442191421274262012-07-13T10:23:00.000+01:002012-07-13T10:23:01.221+01:00Silly PuttyThe mind, it occurs to me, has some of the quality of <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Silly_Putty">silly putty</a> (a silicone
polymer-based toy); if I push at it too forcefully, it
stiffness, but if I move it gently, it moves without resistance. Most
peculiar...<br />
<br />
<a href="http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File%3ASputty.jpg" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;" title="By Hengsheng Huang / Hengsheng120 at en.wikipedia (e-dot webcam (e点)) [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons"><img alt="Sputty" height="222" src="//upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/8/86/Sputty.jpg" width="320" /></a>
<br />
This is most obvious in the Mindfulness of Breathing meditation (a.k.a. Anapanasati) where if I force the mind onto the breath or any other sensation of the body, there is a sort of hardening of the perception which, if ongoing, might even give rise to physical stiffness or head-ache. On the other hand, if allowing myself to just be present with all sensations of the body, including the breath, in a more receptive way, then the quality of the experience is much softer and fluid.<br />
<br />
This is not really a surprise to me, it just that I haven't put it into words before. It seems obvious to me that forcing one's focus onto an object will somehow create a stiffer experience which more often than not is counter-productive to reaching deeper stages of absorption, whereas a more relaxed approach allows me to reach further, but I hadn't really thought to give mind itself this quality of a viscoelastic liquid. Of course, mind is not a liquid, but my mental perception of it runs parallel with the physical perception of working with such a liquid.<br />
<br />
In the Metta Bhavana practice (the developing of Loving Kindness), the difference is most pronounced for me when, on one hand, I work with <i>well wishing</i> (which is "active" and requires more input into the practice, which is more like forcing the mind to focus in the Anapanasati practice), and on the other, when I work with something like <i>patience</i> or <i>allowing</i> (both are Metta-ful intentions but less active and allows for a more receptive practice).<br />
<br />
Anyway... this just occurred to me as I was leading a meditation drop-in session at the Cambridge Buddhist Centre.Kusalanandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10043254830986060703noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-63553533104987493932012-05-21T11:16:00.004+01:002012-05-21T11:16:43.036+01:00Returning to thisSo, I'm back after two years of silence. I'm preparing some posts to try to bridge the years. Patience.Kusalanandahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10043254830986060703noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-43875153221019101692010-11-22T23:05:00.000+00:002010-11-22T23:05:27.131+00:00Śraddhā (faith)Three types of faith, or three aspects of faith, covering three aspects of being, and three types of responses:<br />
<ol><li>Trusting faith (emotional), "it is important"</li>
<li>Lucid faith (cognitive), "it is meaningful"</li>
<li>Longing faith (volitional), "it is worthwhile"</li>
</ol>The three types of faith are (I believe, but my memory might be wrong) traditional, but the connection to the emotional, cognitive, and volitional is that of Sangharakshita's.<br />
<br />
The things in quotes are what I have distilled as my own response to each of the types (or aspects) of faith. I was using these three phrases, that is, <i>this is important</i>, <i>this is meaningful</i>, and <i>this is worthwhile</i>, to describe that which I experienced as my response to faith long before I ever knew about the division of Śraddhā into these three particular categories.<br />
<br />
Making these connections felt almost like assembling many pieces of a jigsaw puzzle.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-20608896390698679432010-08-06T21:51:00.000+01:002010-08-06T21:51:02.592+01:00State of mindFreedom is a very abstract thing.<br />
<br />
I read somewhere in one of the many books on ideology, political philosophy and democracy that I've been reading during this holiday, that freedom (or it might have been democracy, they seem to mean the same thing to many, and most of the authors were liberals) is a state of mind.<br />
<br />
It seems like a reasonable thing to say. Likewise, <i>going for refuge</i> is a state of mind, not merely an intensity of external practice.<br />
<br />
It's too late in the night to continue thinking...Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-90270964783182002912010-08-05T23:37:00.000+01:002010-08-05T23:37:38.786+01:00Holiday in FranceI'm getting back to writing after three months of not writing very much at all. In fact, I haven't even had decent time or space for reflection at all, and it's only due to this one-week holiday in France (with my partner and her sisters, mother, and a friend) that I've been able to stop and think for any substantial length of time (while the girls have been exploring the countryside).<br />
<br />
It's interesting (scary) to notice how easily my energies are diverted. Extra responsibilities at work uses both time and mind-space previously available for reflection, study and other Dharma practices. Fortunately, the pressure from work is slowly decreasing, and this together with a planned solitary retreat in early September are the reasons I don't worry, at the moment. I hope to be back with my ordinary work load towards the end of the year.<br />
<br />
It seems as if solitude and retreat are necessary conditions for intensification of practice, at least for me. For the future, I will need to make sure that I give planning for times of solitude the same weight as planning for other retreats or holiday.<br />
<br />
Without the depth of practice that I know I can have during and after a time of solitude, my time feels wasted, which in turn makes me feel frustrated and agitated. It is enough to know that I've wasted much of my life wandering aimlessly, without any purpose, from one thing to the next. To know what needs to be done, and to not have the time, space, or energy to pursue it, is far worse.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-49387748342034990032010-05-07T11:07:00.000+01:002010-05-07T11:07:25.104+01:00The dream of the mobile phoneAnother dream that I had during the Anapanasati retreat (on the night between the 5th and 6th of April):<br />
<blockquote><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4jt3WMkLC8Y_WeSR3ytFzVb5_kOmr0nz5bGIsXVCmtk2tTkTR0XnzJdEdCXwKcnjCcZ5Qk_QiPDDWj9AroJxdZLIaVqTg-YOCie4CFYEkrjOs5i_7EfHPNXz7ZhUn6IZ66Oj0xUSoyI0/s1600/Nokia_E55.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4jt3WMkLC8Y_WeSR3ytFzVb5_kOmr0nz5bGIsXVCmtk2tTkTR0XnzJdEdCXwKcnjCcZ5Qk_QiPDDWj9AroJxdZLIaVqTg-YOCie4CFYEkrjOs5i_7EfHPNXz7ZhUn6IZ66Oj0xUSoyI0/s200/Nokia_E55.png" width="76" /></a></div>I dreamt that for some reason or other had to turn on my mobile phone. I might have had to send someone an important SMS or something. In turning it on, it proceeds to receive all queued-up text messages and emails.<br />
<br />
With a sense of frustration I realise that every message is being presented to me at once. I cannot see which ones of them might be important and which ones are not. In fact, can't even tell one message from the other,it just a blur of letters and graphics.<br />
<br />
I woke up and spent a good 10 minutes feverishly thinking about how to go about sorting it all out, until I realised it had been a dream.</blockquote><br />
Be well!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-18730323359184261622010-05-05T21:58:00.001+01:002010-05-05T21:58:53.796+01:00Notes for meditation interview 5/4-2010On the Anapanasati retreat, we had meditation interviews. These were opportunities to talk to an experienced meditator for 10 minutes every evening as a way of asking questions related to the practice, and to have the opportunity to verbalise experience, concerns, and other things that arose during the day. This was the only talking that we did during the silence of the retreat.<br />
<br />
I usually took notes during the day. These would serve as the starting point for the interview in the evening. These are notes for the interview on the 5th of April that I jotted down in my notebook:<br />
<blockquote>Dull in the morning.<br />
Possibly too much sleep.<br />
Cold and uncomfortable, sinking.<br />
Restless shrine room.<br />
<br />
Dullness leaves, replaced with alertness.<br />
Happy and content.<br />
Full of energy, but still settled.<br />
(joy)<br />
<br />
Starting to feel the flow of the practice, how one stage leads into the next stage.<br />
Finding the contemplation of <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vedana">vedana</a> liberating.<br />
<br />
<i>The practice is so much simpler than what I thought!</i><br />
Need to build on Just Sitting.<br />
</blockquote><br />
That is all.<br />
Be well!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-37046274734871282332010-05-03T12:22:00.002+01:002010-05-05T22:00:26.115+01:00Grandpa-mindOk, so I can't properly recall the story behind this one, but I found it most useful in meditation. It was mentioned during the Anapanasati retreat in early April. The thinking around this is my own, but the initial story was similar.<br />
<br />
When meditating, try to meditate with <i>grandpa-mind</i> (or, as it may be, grandma-mind).<br />
<br />
We usually meditate with mind of a worried parent, watching our children run around and cause all sorts of havoc, anxiously on the tips of our toes ready to intervene if the play starts to go badly. The children are our thoughts, and our thoughts come, go, and run around, just like small kids sometimes do.<br />
<br />
Think of how grandpa would watch the children play and run around. He would not care too much about what they got up to. He knows that he doesn't need to watch every turn of their play and that they won't hurt themselves too badly, if at all. He can sit contently in his chair (smoking his pipe, as mine used to do), possibly just aware that when the kids are picked up to go home, or to be taken to bed, as they eventually will be, it will once more be quiet.<br />
<br />
So, don't worry about your thought and worries, planning and memories. In meditation you can sit safely knowing that they will come, go, and maybe stay with you for some time. It's all right.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-56898974578832520532010-05-03T01:36:00.002+01:002010-05-05T22:00:44.851+01:00It's not only about youOn the Anapanasati retreat a month ago, on the 4th of April, our teacher (Satyaraja) related a story about someone going to <a href="http://www.sangharakshita.org/">Bhante Sangharakshita</a> with either a question or an experience, I can't remember which or any details about the exchange of words, but it doesn't matter. The crux of the story was the response from Bhante: <i>It's not only about you</i>.<br />
<br />
Now, <i>it's not only about me</i> just happened to be one of the attitudes to Dharma practice that I have found most helpful. As someone who struggles with being too wilful, keeping this phrase in mind focuses me on the real purpose of Dharma practice, which is to work towards the liberation of all beings. I found that constantly reminding myself about this simple fact gave rise to <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Faith_in_Buddhism">śraddhā</a>, and with śraddhā there is no hindrances whatsoever in Dharma practice.<br />
<br />
This is from my notebook:<br />
<blockquote>Practicing the Dharma is not only about me. The Dharma is bigger then me. It existed before me. It is more profound than I can imagine.<br />
<br />
Therefore, I should reverence the Dharma. I should make myself available to it so that it may work itself out through me.<br />
<br />
Is this what is meant by <i>going for refuge</i> to the Dharma?<br />
</blockquote>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-66864480280628977832010-05-01T23:30:00.005+01:002010-05-05T22:01:21.308+01:00The dream of the girl who could see the holy grail<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiovJV0qDI10CBLFMoD7nN6H0D8ATodo6bg3WQkFrJBh3iGRE0DYOWlqJOyma5VwjRCOdej1KEXYxHFALDBvRgjlfUf9Vaha6ZWPlZm7uwbTmAJFrUshKnemO_T2Y7zWLnSi6XSel58_TQ/s1600/Hacker_Arthur_Percival_with_the_Grail_Cup.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiovJV0qDI10CBLFMoD7nN6H0D8ATodo6bg3WQkFrJBh3iGRE0DYOWlqJOyma5VwjRCOdej1KEXYxHFALDBvRgjlfUf9Vaha6ZWPlZm7uwbTmAJFrUshKnemO_T2Y7zWLnSi6XSel58_TQ/s200/Hacker_Arthur_Percival_with_the_Grail_Cup.jpg" width="180" /></a>On the Anapanasati retreat a few weeks ago I had a peculiar dream on the first night (2nd-3rd of April). It is quite common to have all sorts of interesting dreams when one is on retreat. They can be due to all sorts of things, but often nothing more strange than sleeping in a unfamiliar bed in a dorm together with other guys that you may or may not have seen before (some of them possibly snoring).<br />
<br />
The dream went something like this:<br />
<a name='more'></a><br />
<br />
There is a big expanse with trees without leaves. It's raining heavily and the ground can not absorb the water quickly enough. A stream forms, which expands into a river. The water washes the soil away to unearth the bones from various creatures, both animals and humans, long since covered and forgotten about.<br />
<br />
Then I discover three children, babies, all girls. They were also buried by the soil and have now been washed clean by the water from the river. They are very much alive, quite chubby, and happy. I adopt them all as my own children.<br />
<br />
Time then speeds up and they grow into young adults, maybe around twenty years old or so. It seems as if I mistook the gender of two of them, because now the first two children are boys, not girls. There is some kind of story element to the dream that I never remembered, so the narrative is unfortunately lost, but it transpires that three beings are quite special.<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjB5ZnuZn-trNoMoPKaXIfGrt9lqAm4zbDtRrkldN5tzfna8cOgL-RBuIb8kW669fnl_0fM19a7FSOODMEqXoYonFa5k7CS2acM_db_zxSJpT5V6-_Ajmy2cjZl3OZts7O-iwRaXeSVAuo/s1600/Holygrail.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjB5ZnuZn-trNoMoPKaXIfGrt9lqAm4zbDtRrkldN5tzfna8cOgL-RBuIb8kW669fnl_0fM19a7FSOODMEqXoYonFa5k7CS2acM_db_zxSJpT5V6-_Ajmy2cjZl3OZts7O-iwRaXeSVAuo/s200/Holygrail.jpg" width="124" /></a>The first boy is able to turn into a frog and the second boy is able to turn into a dog or wolf, or a least to take on definite dog/wolf-like characteristics. The narrative had very little to say about the first boy, but the second boy was involved with protecting someone (us?) from an attack from something.<br />
<br />
The girl is the most interesting one, because her ability is nothing like those of the two boys. She is able to see the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holy_Grail">holy grail</a>. That's the way I knew it in the dream at least. It obviously does not mean that she's seeing it the whole time, only that she would recognise it for what it was once she saw it.<br />
<br />
(The End)<br />
<br />
I haven't attempted to interpret it, but I find it encouraging that I still remember it. This is my third big dream at <a href="http://www.padmaloka.org.uk/">Padmaloka</a>. The previous two happened on two separate retreats but were curiously connected by a character in the dream. I won't be saying more about that now apart from that those dreams also contained water (but in a cave).<br />
<br />
Anyone who wants to interpret this dream is welcome to give it a shot.<br />
<br />
I think I'll leave it at that for this time.<br />
<br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">[First image: Sir Percival with the Holy Grail, by Arthur Hacker, from </span><a href="http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Hacker_Arthur_Percival_with_the_Grail_Cup.jpg"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Hacker_Arthur_Percival_with_the_Grail_Cup.jpg</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">]</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">[Second image: The Damsel of the Sanct Grael or Holy Grail, by Dante Gabriel Rossetti, from <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Holygrail.jpg">http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Holygrail.jpg</a>]</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-62371307561495746572010-04-25T23:38:00.002+01:002010-04-25T23:53:19.622+01:00The Anapanasati Retreat 2010On the 1st of April this year, I went on my second <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anapanasati">Anapanasati</a> retreat at <a href="http://www.padmaloka.org.uk/">Padmaloka</a>. The retreat is a 10 day long meditation retreat, most of it in silence, and quite intense.<br />
<br />
The first time I attended the retreat, in 2009, I had never been on a long meditation retreat before, and I had a completely unhelpful approach. To cut a long story short, I was far too willful, which led to getting stuck, which led to frustration and ill will. Meditators will recognise this as an easy to make mistake, for some people.<br />
<br />
So, this time around I approached the practice from the direction of the <a href="http://fwbo.org/meditation/justsitting.html">Just Sitting</a> practice. One might say that I let the structure of the Anapanasati practice guide my Just Sitting practice. This was, for me, precisely the right way to practice at this point.<br />
<br />
Lots of useful small and large insights made themselves known during the week, and I'm hoping to write a handful of shorter blog entries around them. Some of them might only be a few sentences long and mostly for my own memory's sake.<br />
<br />
I'll start with the structure of the retreat.<br />
<br />
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Out of the 10 days, seven were in silence, with only 10 minutes each day in dialogue, meditation interview, with the teacher. I found these meditation interviews extremely helpful, both this time around as well as last year, and I was able to work with my teacher around different approaches and attitudes that might provide openings into the practice.<br />
<br />
The Anapanasati practice is divided into 16 stages, and further into four tetrads. The first three days of the retreat were devoted to the first tetrad, the body tetrad.<br />
<br />
Going into silence, we moved on to the second tetrad, the feeling (vedana) tetrad. The practice at this point consisted of eight stages, and we would do the first tetrad followed by about half an hour of walking meditation outdoors, followed by the second tetrad. This went on for about two days.<br />
<br />
In this way, our teacher gradually introduced the third tetrad (mind/citta) and finally the fourth and last tetrad which consists of reflections on the way things are, <a href="http://www.freebuddhistaudio.com/series/details?ser=X23">the three lakshanas</a>.<br />
<br />
That was broadly the way that the retreat was structured.<br />
<br />
On a day-by-day level, the program looked pretty much like the following (it is now some weeks ago, so I might not remember the times exactly right):<br />
<dl><dt>6.30am<br />
</dt>
<dd>Raise.</dd>
<dt>7.00am<br />
</dt>
<dd>Chanting of the Tiratna Vandana followed by a double meditation (e.g., the first two tetrads).</dd>
<dt>9.00am<br />
</dt>
<dd>Breakfast.</dd>
<dt>10.30am<br />
</dt>
<dd>Another double meditation, alternatively an introduction to the next tetrad.</dd>
<dt>1pm<br />
</dt>
<dd>Lunch.</dd>
<dt>4.00pm<br />
</dt>
<dd>Double meditation.</dd>
<dt>6.00pm<br />
</dt>
<dd>Supper.</dd>
<dt>8.30pm<br />
</dt>
<dd>Meditation and puja.</dd></dl><br />
We had quite a lot of spare time in the afternoons. Some would use this for doing yoga, others, like myself, would just sit and look at the garden. Others still would go for strolls around Padmaloka. We were encouraged to not read, not to talk (obviously), but instead to meet with our own experiences and look at feelings as the arose and how they conditioned our minds.<br />
<br />
I was half expecting to feel bored, but to my surprise I instead felt very much alive, happy, and content.<br />
<br />
I'll leave this blog entry at this. The next one might be about a dream I had on the first night. Other topics might include how I encountered stuckness (and dealt with it), the importance of faith (shraddha) in meditation, my favourite Pranjaparamita sutra, when I felt like going on adventure, and other odds and ends.<br />
<br />
Be well!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-25942314738273873972010-04-01T13:36:00.000+01:002010-04-01T13:36:14.301+01:00Three Minute Breathing SpaceFor a friend: A simple method for being.<br />
<br />
<b>Awareness</b> (30s)<br />
<br />
Deliberately adopt an erect and dignified posture. If possible, close your eyes. Then ask: <i>What is my experience right now... in thoughts... in feelings... and in bodily sensations?</i><br />
<br />
Acknowledge and register your experience, even if it is unwanted.<br />
<br />
<b>Gathering</b> (90s)<br />
<br />
Then gently redirect full attention to your breathing. Observe each in-breath, and each out-breath, as they follow, one after the other.<br />
<br />
Your breath can function as an anchor to bring you into the present and help you tune into a state of awareness and stillness.<br />
<br />
<b>Expanding</b> (30s)<br />
<br />
Expand the field of your awareness around your breathing, so that it includes a sense of your body as a whole, your posture, and facial expression.<br />
<br />
Reconnect with your surroundings and with the general direction of the day.<br />
<br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">[adapted from instructions from Segal, Williams, and Teasdale]</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-91966359427578763992010-04-01T11:04:00.000+01:002010-04-01T11:04:46.283+01:00What I've learnt from meditation<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj6MhZloPCHDU7XWp9_n9bg7Ov0OrnMV0WOXfpgEXpq4LF7KEzEPRUm2hEHW8R-Ohyoe2-vZKQe-hENgzNiStuPX9xkmS2G_IBaAxHT00xm9iwl1sU8gQ9CuNdk1o5vhyphenhyphenDKNrO-pqnCPEw/s1600/20100401037.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj6MhZloPCHDU7XWp9_n9bg7Ov0OrnMV0WOXfpgEXpq4LF7KEzEPRUm2hEHW8R-Ohyoe2-vZKQe-hENgzNiStuPX9xkmS2G_IBaAxHT00xm9iwl1sU8gQ9CuNdk1o5vhyphenhyphenDKNrO-pqnCPEw/s320/20100401037.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>There's a couple of things that I've learnt from meditation, and that is that people, things, and events are generally more interesting than what they first appear to be, and that creativity surfaces in the space left by doing nothing.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-1243299780013914062010-02-24T21:17:00.000+00:002010-02-24T21:17:04.186+00:00TherapyI haven't written in a while again. There's been a period of quite a lot of work. I volunteered to take some extra responsibilities at work for a limited time (until the end of February), and it's been taking up too much head space for any serious reflection to take place.<br />
<br />
What I have been thinking about is, amongst other things, meditation (and Buddhist practice in general) in relation to science and therapy.<br />
<br />
I think it's great if people get interested in meditation from a scientific point of view, or because they see it as some kind of therapy (they meditate to become calmer, more focussed, etc.), but it troubles me when meditation is pitched in this way to people by some Buddhist practitioners.<br />
<br />
(a week or so passes here)<br />
<br />
Now, after some further thinking I believe that the issue is not that there are Buddhists that try to pitch meditation as therapy, but rather that I feel uncomfortable with it. It can not be bad to have more people practising meditation, and if they are engaging regularly with their practice there will definitely be results beyond the narrow scope of their therapeutic needs. I will need to further ponder this.<br />
<br />
<br />
Time to sleep a bit.<br />
Good night.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-36034064465650354692010-01-23T21:11:00.001+00:002010-01-23T21:12:01.993+00:00Just SittingToday I attended a practice day on the <i>Just Sitting</i> practice at the Cambridge Buddhist Centre, led by Satyaraja.<br />
<br />
I'm just leaving these residues from the day in the blog for my own benefit.<br />
<br />
The five "Justs":<br />
<ol><li>Just settling.<br />
</li>
<li>Just waiting.<br />
</li>
<li>Just watching.<br />
</li>
<li>Just enjoying.<br />
</li>
<li>Just sitting.<br />
</li>
</ol>Bhavana, meditation, is usually directed (as in the mindfulness of breathing and the metta bhavana), but may also be undirected (according to the Satipatthana Sutta). The undirected bhavana is the just sitting practice.<br />
<br />
The talk by Subhuti that inspired Satyaraja to lead this practice day may be found at <a href="http://media.libsyn.com/media/dharmachakra/podcast35.mp3">http://media.libsyn.com/media/dharmachakra/podcast35.mp3</a> (about 40 minutes).Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-81364633728901656142010-01-12T21:59:00.005+00:002010-01-12T22:37:12.986+00:00Trying to studyI'm in a study group, a Dharma study group. I've been in this group for something like four or five years now and while the others slowly have been replaced over the years, I'm still here.<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXgdWtJ_7LKSCmqr1JVvYifSyXdz3dO6FJBZYQGe6v_tEeSBZQC3H3yVfWAZl8m5mptYMftYX_bVxIa_qeiCFgU1nQCcRRDq0lyTF22xrsZpvDFLgDeSiwzADS1s1z1JLSObMawLqOy3I/s1600-h/Tipitaka_scripture.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXgdWtJ_7LKSCmqr1JVvYifSyXdz3dO6FJBZYQGe6v_tEeSBZQC3H3yVfWAZl8m5mptYMftYX_bVxIa_qeiCFgU1nQCcRRDq0lyTF22xrsZpvDFLgDeSiwzADS1s1z1JLSObMawLqOy3I/s320/Tipitaka_scripture.jpeg" /></a>At the moment we're looking at the <i><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dhammapada">Dhammapada</a></i>, an very early text which is part of the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pali_Canon">Pali Canon</a>. The particular translation we're using (there's 50+ translations of the Dhammapada into English) is that by <a href="http://www.sangharakshita.org/">Sangharakshita</a>, the founder of the Triratna Buddhist Order (which was until recently the Western Buddhist Order).<br />
<br />
The way we run the group is that one of us volunteers to summarise a particular text or seminar, and on the evening he gives the summary as a short presentation. We usually pause the presentation every now and again to ask questions or to discuss the contents. The study leader might bring out further points for discussion that he thinks are important.<br />
<br />
I'm doing the first summary this year, on Thursday this week. It's on a commentary on first few verses from the chapter called <a href="http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/kn/dhp/dhp.14.budd.html">Buddhavagga</a>, or <i>The Enlightened One</i> (chapter 14, verses 179-187). Currently I've got as far as reading the commentary and making a <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mind_map">mind-map</a> of the main points (using <a href="http://freemind.sourceforge.net/wiki/index.php/Main_Page">FreeMind</a>, a quite good piece of mind-mapping software, IMHO). I now have to re-read the commentary a number of times to make sure I know the flow of the text and can talk freely about it without resorting to reading from it too much.<br />
<br />
I'll leave it at that for tonight, blogging-wise I mean, I still have a lot of reading to do. I'll finish with a favourite quote from this material, Dhp 14:183 (in translation by Thanissaro Bhikkhu),<br />
<blockquote>The non-doing of any evil,<br />
the performance of what's skillful,<br />
the cleansing of one's own mind:<br />
this is the teaching<br />
of the Awakened.<br />
</blockquote><br />
Be well!<br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;">[Image adapted from original at WikiMedia Commons: </span><a href="http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Tipitaka_scripture.jpg"><span style="font-size: x-small;">http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Tipitaka_scripture.jpg</span></a><span style="font-size: x-small;">]</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-54063332648441812812010-01-09T11:33:00.000+00:002010-01-09T11:33:44.856+00:00ModerationIt is easier not to eat than to eat in moderation.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-92147733909159425312010-01-03T11:29:00.003+00:002010-01-03T12:10:14.328+00:00Water fasting experiment, day 7+1, breaking the fastIn the beginning of my water fast I did some reading on how to break a fast. It is serious and complicated business.<br />
<br />
I now understand that it is important to break a period of fasting in the right way. <a href="http://www.healthrecipes.com/fast26.htm">One of the texts that I read</a> (well, most of them actually) laid out a schedule for breaking a fast, stretching over several days after the "end" of the fast. I will not follow its advice strictly, but it has alerted me to the fact that I need to be extra careful with not over-eating and to closely monitor my reactions to food in general over the first days (maybe even the whole first week), not eating things that my stomach may disagree with.<br />
<br />
I broke my fast with diluted juices, yoghurt, and bananas. I have some baby food (I was not going to purée anything myself) which got to be ok to eat, much dried fruit, and I believe I have some vegetable soups (the powder variety) lying around as well... The first batch of food went straight through in an hour (no surprise, my guts are clean enough to use for sausages), but the rest stayed for longer. Just hoping I won't get too constipated later.<br />
<br />
Also, I would actually <em>discourage</em> anyone reading this from water fasting for extended periods (more than a week), unless supervised or well experienced, especially if doing it for the first time. A four-day water fast would be quite enough to have to work with discipline for the sake of dealing with the effects of craving, which, being a <a href="http://www.tricycle.com/feature/which-buddhist-personality-type-are-you">greed-type of person</a>, is partly why I did this. As I mentioned in <a href="http://mindtexture.blogspot.com/2010/01/water-fasting-experiment-day-7-looking.html">the previous blog entry</a>, the only obvious change from day four onwards was that I was getting physically weaker, and this was worse than any positive change, mental or otherwise, during the same time.<br />
<br />
In the future, I may fast again, but I will probably keep to short three or four-day water fasts, or longer fasts on liquid diet (soups and juices). The next obvious opportunity for me to try a longer fast will be in the end of December when I have two weeks of solitary retreat planned.<br />
<br />
If I ever do another water fast of this length or longer, it will have to be in the summer, under the conditions of a retreat, preferable with other people around, and most importantly, with ample of time to manage the transition into and out of the fast.<br />
<br />
May all beings be happy!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-47119130545614580562010-01-02T09:30:00.005+00:002010-01-02T11:45:57.230+00:00Water fasting experiment, day 7, looking backToday is the last day of my seven-day water fasting experiment.<br />
<br />
It's been interesting and I have learnt things about myself. I will probably continue to notice how this period of fasting has changed the way I'm living.<br />
<br />
These are the effects of fasting on the way I behave and on how my mind works, as far as I can tell at present:<br />
<a name='more'></a><br />
<ul><li>My energy levels from day three and onwards is seriously below what they usually are. I feel frail when moving about and take extra care to minimize strenuous movements. It feels, for example, as if biking would be a bad idea as I know that walking usually requires less energy. If I did cycle, I would be out of breath soon and would need a long time to recover, with a lot of huffing and puffing. Bending down for a short while and then standing up again will make me feel slightly dizzy.<br />
<br />
</li>
<li>Having said that, my energy levels have been remarkably level. I wasn't really tired throughout the days although I did take a nap most afternoons. Hmm... I was either not tired, or I simply did not notice being tired. I'm not sure which is right now when I think about it. In any case, I have not noticed any particular ups or downs. Usually, I often suffer from "sugar crashes" after a meal (often after lunch for some reason), i.e. feeling sluggish, sleepy, having a hard time concentrating, but not during this week.<br />
<br />
</li>
<li>I found myself planning my days much more than what I usually do. I quite enjoyed this. Not the planning aspect of it but the fact that once laid out, getting through the day would quite simply be a matter of following the pattern I had already decided upon, leaving more time for thinking and reflecting.<br />
<br />
</li>
<li>With depleted energy levels, I found that I was very careful with movements. Maybe <i>measured</i> is a better word. It feels as if I am moving like an old man.<br />
<br />
</li>
<li>Day two and three were the most difficult days. I don't know enough about the physiology of fasting but I believe I read in the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Famine_response">famine response</a> article on Wikipedia that there is a shift in the way that the metabolism works after about three days of fasting which possibly may have something to do with it.<br />
<br />
</li>
<li>I think that if I do this again, I will limit it to four days only. After day four, the only noticeable change in myself is that I am becoming physically weaker. Not eating is no longer a problem, and the act of working with discipline to counter craving therefore becomes too easy to be interesting or beneficial in any sort of way.<br />
<br />
</li>
<li>I'm definitely multi-tasking less. I do one thing at a time. I won't say that I find it easier to build up concentration or focus, but when a focus has been achieved, it is easier to hold it. This applies primarily to focus in physical activity, such as talking to people, carrying out tasks around the house, walking outside, and shopping. It also made it easier to sit and do nothing for long periods, which I found that I enjoyed. Reflections also came more naturally and it was easier to consciously carry them forward.<br />
<br />
</li>
<li>Preparing for meditation became more of a ritual (again, the word <i>measured</i> comes to mind) but this may just be out of habit, an effect of the retreat-like circumstances that I have been living in during most of the week (silence, not much contact with busy people, etc.). The mediation itself is also different in character, in a similar way as what I said above about focusing in physical activity. The effect was not as great on my meditation as on my physical activity though.<br />
<br />
</li>
<li>I think that the overall effect on my mind has been that of a settling down. My whole being feels more calm, centered, and contented. This isn't to say that I've lost any initiative in my practice, but it does mean that things definitely has become clearer, that the things/values that I feel are important to me has entered the centre and that other things simply have been shifted out of focus.<br />
<br />
</li>
<li>Out of all Dharma practices, it was in the end not meditation that changed the most, but the way I was able to reflect.</li>
</ul>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-67924777100966034972009-12-31T13:50:00.000+00:002009-12-31T13:50:10.825+00:00For the New Year<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjNq0wy7bPU0TqhS0Ilf1JNzmhBVeHkJrbFBEjoEb97_T678GAXg8jk2sirIk1DbcKc-pIfq5QtlrWKHFngFEJHknm5m-_8PqFTYhNWEbiAEqRMzdC7xVI3m1styhn7c8XMrE4pqXrWNJI/s1600-h/for_the_new_year.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjNq0wy7bPU0TqhS0Ilf1JNzmhBVeHkJrbFBEjoEb97_T678GAXg8jk2sirIk1DbcKc-pIfq5QtlrWKHFngFEJHknm5m-_8PqFTYhNWEbiAEqRMzdC7xVI3m1styhn7c8XMrE4pqXrWNJI/s320/for_the_new_year.jpg" /></a><br />
</div>I don't usually make <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/New_Year's_resolution">New Year's resolutions</a>, but I thought I'll make a bit of an exception this year. I've been thinking about this for quite some time, and I've come up with three resolutions. I already do not smoke nor drink and I'm not overweight, so my resolutions are a bit different from the most common ones. Also, I see them more like <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Slogan">slogans</a>, akin to the slogans of the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lojong">Lojong</a> practice.<br />
<a name='more'></a><br />
<ul><li><b>Take no shortcuts.</b><br />
<br />
Taking a shortcut is a sign of impatiens and of being in a hurry. I do not want to feel like being in a hurry, and I do not want to be impatient. I am hoping that I may practice patience and contentment by not taking shortcuts.<br />
<br />
A shortcut can be many things. It can be walking diagonally across the street or cutting a corner across a lawn to get somewhere quicker. It can also be excessive use of abbreviations, a sign of a hurried mind, too eager to make its point or to deliver a message. To be in a hurry, to be impatient, is not only a sign of stress but also a state in which mistakes are easily made. I would like to make fewer mistakes, to make constructive use of time, to think things through, to know what to do and when to do it.<br />
<br />
I'm a software developer so in my work I write computer software. This software is sometimes used by a large number of people. Taking a shortcut (sometimes by implementing a <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kludge">kludge</a>) is often tempting when a re-design might the more sustainable option. This happens when I'm under pressure. Therefore I will try to not be under pressure, to set up conditions in such a way that I am not tempted to cut corners, so that I have the time needed to take the longer but more wise path. This will benefit not only myself but hopefully also anyone who uses the software I'm writing.<br />
<br />
It is also a shortcut to over-generalize, to simplify too much, to not consider any contributing factors, to not consider the possible outcomes apart from the obvious or the wanted one, or to fail to listen to the other view. To see issues in black or white, to hold too tightly to a view, or to think I know it all, these are all shortcuts, ways past difficult terrain, strategies to avoid uncomfortable topics or situations. There can be no growth out of the present state or movement towards something higher unless one is willing to go beyond oneself. One does not go beyond oneself by being comfortable.<br />
<br />
So, I will practice not taking shortcuts.<br />
<br />
</li>
<li><b>Expect nothing in return.</b><br />
<br />
This has to to do with being authentic, to genuinely enjoy every little last bit of whatever I'm doing, just for the sake of doing it. Or putting it the other way around, to do whatever I'm doing because it's worth doing, not to get something out of it, to be wholeheartedly engaged and to pay attention.<br />
<br />
Expectations ruins not only the day, but my own future engagement with what I'm doing. To not have any expectation and still be committed to the task at hand is difficult. It is a letting go, a renunciation. Of what? Well, a letting go of the view that any action needs to be performed in a transactional universe, within a bubble in which everything has to be bargained for. It requires me to look at why I do things, and maybe it will result in a change to some of my habits or attitudes.<br />
<br />
For example, I'm not meditating to become calmer or more concentrated, as if it was some kind of therapy, a way of sorting myself out, or a personal development technique. I meditate because it forces me to seriously consider how I got to be where I currently am, what I'm doing while I'm here, and to look at where I'm going once I'm ready to leave. What happens when I do that? Meditation suddenly becomes much more enjoyable! If you're meditating, try it yourself. It's an opening up to the unknown.<br />
<br />
To not expect anything in return is also to give with an open hand. It is not until there is no expectation of getting anything in return that the gift is truly a gift, when it is unbound by any contract, not given with expected reciprocity. That's when the gift can truly change hands. Unless this happens, I will never be able to give anything away, no matter if it is a physical thing, support, or knowledge.<br />
<br />
So, I will practice not expecting anything in return.<br />
<br />
</li>
<li><b>Do not try.</b><br />
<br />
Not trying means either doing or not doing. It means not being vague but instead to be clear and honest. It means not making promises unless they are well thought through. It implies integrity, to be integrated, to be whole.<br />
<br />
I think that in this resolution is also a wish to be more realistic. Being realistic means seeing reality, this state of being, for what it is and not expecting it to provide me with more than what is viable. It also means knowing my own weaknesses, so that I do not set out to do something I'm incapable of doing.<br />
<br />
At the same time, as realism and idealism are in conflict, I don't want to set aside my idealism on which I often base my faith, which in turn gives me a sense of direction. These are indeed two interesting extremes to try (!) to find a <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Middle_way">middle way</a> between.<br />
<br />
The danger with this is, of course, that I might decide to <i>not</i> set out to explore the boundaries of my <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Comfort_Zone_Theory">comfort zone</a>, that I won't even <i>try</i> to change and grow, something that I believe Buddhism is all about. Well, I will just have to keep that in mind, won't I? After all,<br />
<br />
<blockquote><i>If we did all the things that we are capable of doing, we would literally astound ourselves.</i> [Thomas A. Edison]<br />
</blockquote><br />
</li>
</ul>Have a good year, everyone!<br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;">[Photo by myself]</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-22888303723391009832009-12-29T15:41:00.001+00:002009-12-29T16:41:59.712+00:00Water fasting experiment, day 3Some things I've noticed during the water fast so far:<br />
<div><ol><li>Time is different. I can sit for an hour watching the birds eat from the bird feeders in the garden.<br />
<br />
</li>
<li>I'm finding it hard to keep my hands and feet warm. This might be related to the next point.<br />
<br />
</li>
<li>I'm drinking more water than I thought I would, around 1.5 litres every 3rd hour for the 14-16 hours of the day that I am awake, i.e. between 7 and 8 litres a day. I think this is a bit too much so I will try to decrease it to the 4 litres a day that I had planned. I don't want to poison myself with too much water.<br />
<br />
How much <i>should</i> I drink?<br />
<br />
The <a href="http://www.bda.uk.com/">British Dietetic Association</a> <a href="http://www.bda.uk.com/foodfacts/070606_fluid.pdf">recommends</a> between 1.5 and 2.5 litres a day (6 to 8 glasses). <a href="http://www.wikihow.com/Drink-More-Water-Every-Day">Elsewhere</a>, it is recommended to drink as many litres as your weight in kilograms divided by 30 (2.7 litres if I'm 80 kg), or as many US fluid ounces as half your weight in pounds (88 fl oz if I'm 176 lbs).<br />
<br />
Looking for the above information provided me with lots of interesting reading, and as soon as I've finished my fasting I'll try to be a bit more observant with the amount of water I'm drinking (I think I'm usually not drinking enough).<br />
<br />
</li>
<li>When craving food, I sometimes get a phantom sensation of tastes in my mouth, like that of bread or peanuts.<br />
<br />
</li>
<li>My mouth tastes horrid in the evenings. It probably doesn't smell too good either.<br />
<br />
</li>
<li>I definitely use food as a source of comfort. It's so easy to pick up an apple or a sandwich even though I'm not really hungry. Another thing to keep in mind once the fast is over...</li>
</ol>Apart from all that, I'm sleeping fine and although I'm very slow to get up in the morning I feel fine once I've meditated. I have revised my times a bit and I now do my meditation at 7 am, which means that the dawn is well underway when I get up from my seat, which is nice. I haven't taken the walks I said I would, but I'm ok with that.<br />
</div><div><br />
</div><div>Be well.<br />
</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-35255590063675385192009-12-23T22:37:00.003+00:002009-12-24T12:01:55.006+00:00Water fasting, a seven-day experiment<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_8zJHqkmU2wwnxjgSDvdXCA4cRJ5zoN5wD4_Tf2nuO15AbgfxURhYPrHPExJKEEOv91jeqJINz4dwXbP-Htara09pr3wvrd4AptEIrf6d_-eHcOYnn0RpTjcB0wqfxjGzkCqivhWl4EM/s1600-h/Plate_and_fork.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" ps="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_8zJHqkmU2wwnxjgSDvdXCA4cRJ5zoN5wD4_Tf2nuO15AbgfxURhYPrHPExJKEEOv91jeqJINz4dwXbP-Htara09pr3wvrd4AptEIrf6d_-eHcOYnn0RpTjcB0wqfxjGzkCqivhWl4EM/s200/Plate_and_fork.jpg" /></a>Water fasting is a type of fasting where nothing but water is consumed over a specific time. The reasons why people might go through a period of fasting are many, but they usually span the health/spiritual spectra.<br />
</div></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">I'm planning a seven-day water fast between the morning of the 27th of December and the morning of the 3rd of January. It's an experiment.<br />
</div></div><br />
<a name='more'></a>These are some of my reasons for doing this:<br />
<ul><li style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">On the eve of the 26th, I will be coming home from visiting my family in Sweden. I will have generally been consuming too much food and I will probably feel bloated and over-stimulated. This happens every time I'm visiting my family and is mostly due to me not saying no when being offered hospitality. It would be good to balance myself, to properly "detox", from all that, both mentally and physically. I realize this is not a good way of starting a fast, but I will none the less give it a go.</li>
<li style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">I'd like to see what happens to my meditation practice and my state of mind in general during an extended fasting period. I've done half-hearted two-day fasts before on a couple of occasions and I've generally found them to be beneficial in terms of calming and centring my state of being.</li>
<li>I'd like to observe my body's reaction to the fasting and it will be interesting to have to deal with physical craving.</li>
<li style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">Although I'm at home, I'm on holiday, and I will be on my own for this period, which makes it a perfect week for trying an experiment like this. It's also, I think, a good way of starting a new year.</li>
<li style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">Notice the absence of a weight-loosing reason. I cycle to work to stay fit (32 km/day) and we don't even own a bathroom scale.</li>
</ul><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">I aim at having a daily schedule that might look something like this:<br />
</div><ul><li style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRQOyYsZdwY28QZuo1ZW4joQgij4u7b6sala_XwQNRmyfsee-R_oDBUpA7XAtk_iVq7QUHJPzshFToYE1b0b4-Z6ABFHGzhncLlyEu6Z6trXFVbLDUk7ONiFfj2_bq-UZnQtuRm312Q-s/s1600-h/Water_tap.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" ps="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRQOyYsZdwY28QZuo1ZW4joQgij4u7b6sala_XwQNRmyfsee-R_oDBUpA7XAtk_iVq7QUHJPzshFToYE1b0b4-Z6ABFHGzhncLlyEu6Z6trXFVbLDUk7ONiFfj2_bq-UZnQtuRm312Q-s/s200/Water_tap.jpg" /></a>Rise at 05:50 for meditation at 06:00 for about one hour or slightly more (this is my usual routine during any working day in any case). This is the only thing that I <em>need</em> to do every day, apart from drinking water.</li>
<li style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">At 08:00, or whenever I've had a shower, I will take a walk for about one hour. There's a nice walk by the river Cam into town and back that I'm thinking about doing every day. At this time of day, at this time of the year, I'm not expecting too many people to be out and about (but we'll see). The walk is for exercise and it will enable me to monitor my energy levels.</li>
<li>Most of the rest of the day will be free time, but I will probably have a nap at some point in the afternoon and I might meditate if that's what feels right.</li>
<li>At 21:00 or whenever I decide it's getting late, I'll sit in meditation for another hour.</li>
<li>I'll aim at being in bed at 22:00, but I'm happy if I get an average of eight hours of sleep a night.</li>
</ul>I'll try to drink about four litres of water each day.<br />
<br />
Oh, and since I'm not planning on turning this into a fasting blog, I will probably not report on daily progress.<br />
<br />
Sleep well.<br />
<br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: xx-small;">[First photo by sriram on Flickr: </span><a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/sriram/" rel="cc:attributionURL"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">http://www.flickr.com/photos/sriram/</span></a><span style="font-size: xx-small;"> / </span><a href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc/2.0/" rel="license"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">CC BY-NC 2.0</span></a><span style="font-size: xx-small;">]<br />
[Second photo by scribe on Flickr: </span><a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/scribe/" rel="cc:attributionURL"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">http://www.flickr.com/photos/scribe/</span></a><span style="font-size: xx-small;"> / </span><a href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/2.0/" rel="license"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">CC BY-NC-SA 2.0</span></a><span style="font-size: xx-small;">]</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-68122907596909572362009-12-18T21:55:00.001+00:002009-12-19T23:39:48.113+00:00All is realAll is real, or rather, everything is as real as anything else.<br />
<br />
Nothing is just a fantasy.<br />
<br />
The magician, and the siddhi, knows this. For them, there is no difference between the dream, the imagined, and the conventional reality.<br />
<br />
Therein lies their power.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6448452952852835973.post-38029606681064073792009-12-08T14:30:00.004+00:002009-12-08T21:11:34.789+00:00Refuge verses<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCMcWo863gPSpJUc7Yh2TOXzHei2_wzNR4zkSQVIgkJssBVnoBE6-0KPtFBk9VdR3GokrD3JvCdxh0TXFNNve84a8ZV4Lf_LkOCF7MhkSPPtmoqpM9mpR9ZUN310Ec03iaYN5Etgi7LWw/s1600-h/Meditation_seat.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCMcWo863gPSpJUc7Yh2TOXzHei2_wzNR4zkSQVIgkJssBVnoBE6-0KPtFBk9VdR3GokrD3JvCdxh0TXFNNve84a8ZV4Lf_LkOCF7MhkSPPtmoqpM9mpR9ZUN310Ec03iaYN5Etgi7LWw/s320/Meditation_seat.jpg" /></a><br />
</div><br />
This is the short refuge verse I end my meditation practice with:<br />
<blockquote>From now onwards,<br />
Until the attainment of Enlightenment,<br />
With great reverence of body, speech, and mind,<br />
I go for refuge to the Buddha Śākyamuni.<br />
</blockquote>These lines are taken from the Tiratna Vandana, the Salutation to the Three Jewels:<br />
<blockquote>Buddham jīvita-pariyantam saranaṁ gacchāmi.<br />
Dhammaṅ jīvita-pariyantam saranaṁ gacchāmi.<br />
Sanghaṁ jīvita-pariyantam saranaṁ gacchāmi.<br />
</blockquote><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">[Photo by me]</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0