The Anapanasati Retreat 2010

On the 1st of April this year, I went on my second Anapanasati retreat at Padmaloka. The retreat is a 10 day long meditation retreat, most of it in silence, and quite intense.

The first time I attended the retreat, in 2009, I had never been on a long meditation retreat before, and I had a completely unhelpful approach. To cut a long story short, I was far too willful, which led to getting stuck, which led to frustration and ill will. Meditators will recognise this as an easy to make mistake, for some people.

So, this time around I approached the practice from the direction of the Just Sitting practice. One might say that I let the structure of the Anapanasati practice guide my Just Sitting practice. This was, for me, precisely the right way to practice at this point.

Lots of useful small and large insights made themselves known during the week, and I'm hoping to write a handful of shorter blog entries around them. Some of them might only be a few sentences long and mostly for my own memory's sake.

I'll start with the structure of the retreat.


Out of the 10 days, seven were in silence, with only 10 minutes each day in dialogue, meditation interview, with the teacher. I found these meditation interviews extremely helpful, both this time around as well as last year, and I was able to work with my teacher around different approaches and attitudes that might provide openings into the practice.

The Anapanasati practice is divided into 16 stages, and further into four tetrads. The first three days of the retreat were devoted to the first tetrad, the body tetrad.

Going into silence, we moved on to the second tetrad, the feeling (vedana) tetrad. The practice at this point consisted of eight stages, and we would do the first tetrad followed by about half an hour of walking meditation outdoors, followed by the second tetrad. This went on for about two days.

In this way, our teacher gradually introduced the third tetrad (mind/citta) and finally the fourth and last tetrad which consists of reflections on the way things are, the three lakshanas.

That was broadly the way that the retreat was structured.

On a day-by-day level, the program looked pretty much like the following (it is now some weeks ago, so I might not remember the times exactly right):

6.30am

Raise.

7.00am

Chanting of the Tiratna Vandana followed by a double meditation (e.g., the first two tetrads).

9.00am

Breakfast.

10.30am

Another double meditation, alternatively an introduction to the next tetrad.

1pm

Lunch.

4.00pm

Double meditation.

6.00pm

Supper.

8.30pm

Meditation and puja.

We had quite a lot of spare time in the afternoons. Some would use this for doing yoga, others, like myself, would just sit and look at the garden. Others still would go for strolls around Padmaloka. We were encouraged to not read, not to talk (obviously), but instead to meet with our own experiences and look at feelings as the arose and how they conditioned our minds.

I was half expecting to feel bored, but to my surprise I instead felt very much alive, happy, and content.

I'll leave this blog entry at this. The next one might be about a dream I had on the first night. Other topics might include how I encountered stuckness (and dealt with it), the importance of faith (shraddha) in meditation, my favourite Pranjaparamita sutra, when I felt like going on adventure, and other odds and ends.

Be well!